02. A guitar's minimum requirement is an amp. A girl's minimum requirement is shoes, clothes, makeup, a mirror, magazines, more shoes and a tiny handbag. And that's every week!
03. You'll never turn on a girl as fast as you can turn on an amp.
04. If your guitar sounds crap, you can tune it. If your girl talks crap you're stuck with her.
05. Guitar's, unlike girls, have volume control which goes all the way down.
06. If you play your guitar crap, it tells you its crap. It doesn't lie and pretend you did it right when you didn't!
07. Two girls at once is hard to come by. Double kneck guitars are not.
08. Your guitar makes a sound only when you want it to.
09. Nobody cares when you dump your old, out of date guitar for a new, younger model. In fact it's encouraged.
10. With a guitar, you can copy tunes from other songs. With a girl, try telling her you're copying some moves from an ex and she'll throw you out.
11. Your guitar doesn't refuse to let you play it once a month.
12. Your guitar will never find out if you've been playing another guitar behind its back.
13. You don't have to get guitars drunk before using them.
14. You can stare at a guitar all you like, but stare at a girl too long and you'll end up in an immense amount of pain.
15. Watching other people play the guitar is entertaining. Watching other people do it is just sick!
